Mark's NLP, Coaching, and more

Caetextia – It's all about context Joe Griffin and Ivan Tyrrell first coined the term "caetextia" in 2007 in respect to Autism in that people on the autistic spectrum rarely consider things in their wider context or in relation to other contexts. Maybe you have seen episodes of the TV series ‘Bones’ where the lead character Dr. Temperance Brennan is said to be based on a character with Aspergers Syndrome. Her literal take on events and conversations serves both to frustrate other cast members and entertain the audience; it is context blindness in action. Noam Chomsky, a leading authority in transformational grammar, stated in 1957 that human beings unconsciously use three processes to filter information in order to create their/our own personal reality. According to him, we delete, distort and generalise information; in CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) this would be classified as assumption filters. I mention this filter process as I consider it how context blind...

FREE Introduction to Hypnosis Would you like to understand how fears and phobias are structured/ Would you like to be in charge of the state you are in? the Pre-Christmas offer is for a FREE day on Friday 6th December in Birmingham. If you would like more details please follow the link above or contact me by FREE Introduction to Hypnosis day on Friday 6th December . regards Mark

I recently completed an NLP Master-Trainer course and was amazed at the experience of the trainers; more than that I was amazed at the flexibility of response to the challenges set by Christina Hall. The reason I’m opening the blog with this is because I want to discuss anxiety states and specifically presentations and public speaking. There is a long held belief that the fear of public speaking is built on negative experiences from school years; maybe a teacher called you out in from of the class, maybe sports day, maybe school assembly or something similar. The belief is that patterns of belief are built and in an effort to avoid perceived danger situations the unconscious mind fires off an anxiety response (fight-or-flight). We can look at the function of amygdalae the in this process but I leave that to your research. Anxiety is not a negative state, it has no negative intention, it has a purpose and that purpose is heightened response readiness. In fact if you consider t...

How does the rewind technique really work? I remember when I attended my HG rewind training and Joe and he said “we have taken the phobia cure used in NLP and improved it” (or something to that effect). He said “what was missing was the creating the correct state first and the technique should only be performed once a person is in a state of deep relaxation”.   In hypnotic terms you could also create a ‘safe place’ and ensure the person is in or can access that safe place easily. This made me think more about my NLP training and how this compares to my HG training of this technique. Suddenly it came to me that Richard Bandler describes it as a process and states “People misunderstand NLP and see it as a series of techniques when actually it is an attitude of tenacity and curiosity from which a methodology has been built and from that techniques have been developed. Techiques are a test or application of the attitude and methodology, they are NOT NLP!! ” Tonight I saw ...

what actually is a fear of holidays? new places new people leaving work spending too much time with your family fear of the unknown not wanting to come back to your real life! it not meeting your expectations drinking too much and vomiting There are so many possibilities.... How about we consider what some call 'the law of attraction' or 'what you focus on is what you'll get! Our brain is a heat seeking missile and doesn't really know the difference between imagination and reality that’s why we get sucked into a good book or film and develop phobias/fears just like this one. In NLP we use a structure to build goals or more specifically ‘well-formed outcomes’ The well-formedness conditions: 1.       Be stated in the positive (that is, what you want, rather than what you don’t want), see positive and negative 2.       Be capable of representation in the sensory representational system (tangi...

How often do you put stuff off? assignments, DIY, getting married, looking for a new job etc etc.... Its amazing how we'll procrastinate to the point that we'll doing something else (anything else) rather than the thing we know needs doing. To top that the things we often do are even harder than the thing we're putting off but because the fear of getting started passes our emotional threshold the problem here is that there is a fault in human design which makes us intially focus on what we don't want rather than focus on what we do want. Unfortunately whatever you focus on is what you get, its sometimes referred to as the law of attraction.... In NLP the process of fixing is is to biuld well formed outcomes; the stages are: 1) State the goal in positive terms. what you want NOT what you dont want 2) Specify the goal in Sensory Based Terms - VAKOG 3) Specify the goal in a way that you find compelling 4) Run a eccology check on your Goal to make sure it is for y...

Whilst teaching an NLP course in Birmingham today we got to a discussion on phobias and how they can be dealt with. It is one of those areas the NHS seems to have trouble dealing with and so either medicates or refers for therapy. The therapy of choice seems to be CBT One lady talked about her experience of CBT for her OCD and how helpful it had been then I suddenly remembered a story about a Emetophobia support group in Birmingham.... They had tried CBT etc and the 'therapist' in charge thought he'd try what he thought was NLP and the fast phobia cure.... If you are not sure how it works it is based on changing the emotional response by a version fo flooding in a hypnotic trance. The patient is put into a trance and asked to watch a movie of the their fear played forwards and backwards. There is a bit more detail to it than that but that's enough for my blog.... He thought "I know, I'll use the same process but as its a group session I'll go one better ...

Are you scared of trying new things? unhapy with what you have or are doing but fearful of the unknown ? Have you ever seen the film Groundhog day ? With Bill Murray The only rule is change requires change..... change of thinking, change of action, change of outlook etc etc. I once tricked an engineer to come and work for me by playing on his fear of change and giving him what he said would make him feel safe.... A company car Yers later he wanted to leave but wouldn't because he wouldn't get a company car... His job didn't even justify one but it actually cost our company less than the pay rise we'd offered him in the past. That was 6 years ago anf I've long since stopped working for other people but he's still there doing the same things acting in the same way and expecting something different to happen. What is at the edge of your map? There be dragons on the old pirate films but what were the dragons really anyway...

This is a common condition for the newly self-emplyed as they worry that if they turn down work, any work, they they wont get asked again or they'll run out of work! Truth is its a self distructive mindset and can lead to burn out or taking the carp jobs nobody else wants.... follow some simple rules 1) what is th current market value for your product or service? 2) what is your USP? 3) why did you go self-employed in the first place? 4) how much do you actually need? Its not solely self-employed as I often see clients with anxiety issues around the risk of losing their job as maybe their role isn't really needed or they're not that great at it. Their self-talk says things like "If I am always seen to be busy then I'm needed" and "If I'm not busy people will think I'm lazy". the worst part is they haven't got a clear clasification for what consitutes 'busy' heres a suggestion.... press pause for a moment and ask yoursel...

I remember reading a poster in Athena years ago which said "ships are safe in the harbour but that's not what ships are for". and more recently in a Ben's Brother track I heard the line "is it that you want me to change so you can stay the same". Change is a natural process and the world is constant moving and changing; in fact standing still causes stagnation and we all know what that looks and smells like. The great +Gregory Bateson wrote that we can't step into the same river twice yet so many of fight change at all cost and try to hold onto something however painful it maybe. Management of Change is just that 'managing' taking charge of rather than being swept along by. Don't fear change but embrace it with excitement. Oh the joy of learning from new possibilities

Do you get that Monday feeling? is it nervousness or excitement? whats the difference between the two? Hears is a fun exercise to set the frame for the day, give it a go. 1) image butting on a coat that created a whole state of being and mind set and this coat was called "Mondays fill me with dread, I dont know how badly the day will go, I have so much to do I dont know where to start and that worries me.... How does that make you experience Monday? 2) next but on this new wonder coat "WOW Monday.... I'm really curious what will happen today, it will be fun and exciting and even a challenge is a new oportunity to learn and learning is fun!! which do you prefer? You choose from now on

As the end of April approaches so the carboot season begins..... The urge to get up early on the weekend to rush to an open field or large carpark in search of a hidden treasure in amongst somebodys old junk. Whether you're there to buy or to sell you cant deny the draw. In France it is called Vide Grenier which translates as 'empty attic' and is a great description. I am an addict and as I write this blog I'm looking forward to our first real opportunity of the year to get up at 7am and rush off to Studley carboot near Redditch. Do you suffer from buysomecrapaphobia - the fear that when you get home with that fantastic item and unpack it that in fact all you've done is added to the stockpile of junk you'll have to load into your car and sell at another carboot in the vain hope that some fool feels they need it as you foolishly did. The best cure for this phobia is the technique known a 'flooding' or buying so much stuff that you emotionally and/or f...

I realise blogging on social media about effects of social isolation seems a strange thing but   +Mark Peters  talked about it recently in a radio interview and the white paper on #GAD (generalised anxiety disorder) by the #NHS is poiting more and more to this as a growing problem. face-to-face connection is losing over cyber-connection but as less than 8% of communication is actual words where does this leave us? +Donna Blinston  runs a great radio show called the NLP View where this and other subjects are discussed. Rapport is King and rapport is built on trust. Maybe its time to make #NLP a requirement in resolving social phobias